阅读典范英语

丰富写作内涵

阅读典范英语,丰富写作内涵

曲塘中学  杜昌兰

近年来,高考阅卷评分标准对英语作文的要求越来越高。除了能正确全面的表达要点之外,还要求学生适当丰富写作内涵即使用一些高级词汇、复杂句式、过渡句等,让文章表达的内容更趋于自然,优美,从而让读者阅读时除了获得必要信息之外还可以欣赏或感悟一些语境,并留下美好印象。然而在平时的教学中我们发现学生在写书面表达时往往注重的只是语言要点的齐全,几乎不考虑在所给语言点的基础上如何丰富文章的内涵。殊不知,很多时候,文章初步形成之后,适当进行审视,在需要之处稍添几笔便让文章的主题得到升华、作者的情感得到更好体现、内涵得以深化阐述、内容更完善,起到画龙点睛的效果。当然些许添笔绝不是无病呻吟,而是对文章中的语言点或提示进行合理的拓展,让读者读之言之有理。明白这一道理很简单,关键是怎么让我们的学生能成功的做到这一点,只是熟记一些词汇短语或句型是远远不够的,我们必须提高学生的阅读语感,让学生多接触好的英语文学作品,从而提高他们的英语语言运用能力,而典范英语的阅读为这一目标的达成提供了一个强有力的平台。

典范英语(Good English)这套经典英语学习材料,以轻松、幽默、活泼的故事,打动了无数学生的心,打开了他们丰富的想象和智慧的心灵,让学生在阅读欣赏的同时,甚至在那些幽默诙谐的表达中自然提升了他们的阅读语感和英语文化底蕴。举个例子:( Noisy neighbors

    In a grim, grey house in a grim, grey town lived an unhappy man. 

    It was not his grey house that made Mr Flinch unhappy. It was not that he was poor, because he was not. Mr Flinch was a miser. He never gave away a penny. ( He never gave away a smile either. ) He was a mean and miserable man.

    Mr Flinch was miserable because of his neighbours.

    On one side of Mr Flinch’s grim, grey house stood a jolly red one. It belonged to Carl Clutch who mended cars.

    Carl loved cars – and motorbikes and vans and lorries. Every morning, Mr Flinch woke up to hear hammers banging, spanners clanging and engines revving. The whole street shook with the noise.

    On the other side, in a bright blue house, lived a music teacher called Poppy Plink. Each morning, Poppy sat down and played grand tunes on her grand piano. After breakfast, her students started to arrive.

    Violins screeched, drums thundered and bassoons bellowed. Mr Flinch shut his window, but the noise still came through the wall. Brum – brum, tootle – toot, bang! His whole house shook and shivered.

在一个严峻的,灰色的城镇中,有一座严峻的,灰色的的房子,房子中又生活了一个不快乐的男人。不是因为他的灰色房子,Flinch先生不快乐,不是因为他很穷,因为他并非如此。Flinch先生是一个吝啬鬼。他从未给过别人一个便士(他从未给过别人一个微笑),他是一个吝啬和凄惨的人

他很悲惨,是因为他的邻居。

Flinch先生那灰色的,严峻的房子的一侧,有一座朱红色的房子,那是属于Carl Clutch修理工的。Carl爱汽车,摩托车,面包车和卡车。每天早上,Flinch先生工作时,不断的听到锤子声和发动机加速运转起来了的声音

一侧,在明亮的蓝色的房子里,住着一位叫Poppy Pink的音乐教师。每天早上,Poppy坐下来,在她那架高大的钢琴上弹了一首盛大的舞曲。早餐后,她的学生陆陆续续到达了。小提琴发出了刺耳的声音,鼓发出了雷鸣般的声音,低音管在咆哮着,Flinch先生关上了窗子,但这声音还是穿透了墙壁。Brum-brum  totle-toot bang!他的整个房子都在颤抖着…..

这只是其中很普通的一个例子,但它所使用的语言简单却表达出极为丰富的情感,与非常生动的心理,学生在多次朗读与体验了这样的作品后,自然会受到启示,并逐步形成语感,从而在英语语言的输出上会有很大的提升。写作时自然会丰富了写作的内涵。

现在通过一些具体的例子来分析在写作中如何丰富文章的内涵。

一、文章主题的升华

大多数学生在写作中会忽视其收尾的效果,常常一带而过, 草草收尾。很易给人留下意犹未尽的感觉,而表达内容也平淡无味,起不到升华主题的功能作用。试比较下面的两段内容:

A). From the two photos, I know it’s not easy for them to do their work well and they all work hard in order to make our environment more beautiful. We should learn from them.

B). The two photos also have touched my heart. I will regard devotion as my goal in life, having more diligence and few complaints. Meanwhile, I appeal to the whole society to respect cleaners’ labor, and to the government to improve their working and living conditions.

这篇文章是以两张照片为题,介绍了普通环卫工人的事迹,要求学生结合图片谈谈自己的感受。A只是平淡地描写了环卫工人的劳动不易和个人肤浅的感受,毫无精彩之处,很是平淡。而B无论是在遣词造句上还是句式运用上都技高一筹,个人感受也论述深刻,因为运用了典范英语中那些细腻而生动的描写手法,如:touched my heartregard devotion as my goal in lifehaving more diligence and few complaintsappeal to等。这些可谓用词精辟,独具匠心,读后令人回味无穷。且实现了呼吁全社会应尊重环卫工人的劳动,以及政府应改善他们的工作和生活环境的目的。很好地突出了文章的主题,与全文的主题内容更是遥相呼应,留给人耳目一新的感觉。

二、内涵的深化阐述

在现实的写作中,很多学生缺乏提炼语言点的能力,表述内容常常浮于表面,未能对所提供的语言点进行较为深刻的阐述。阅读下面两个段落,进行对比,其不同点一目了然。

A). As a student, I have been learning English for years, I think it good to learn some grammar and remember some sentence patterns. Besides, if we read more in our free time, our English will be better. I often read English newspapers and magazines after class, like English Weekly, 21 st Century and China Daily.

B). Here I’d like to share my learning methods. First, I think it useful to learn some grammar and remember as many useful sentence patterns as I can. I believe the more we read, the better our English will be. So I spend much time reading English newspapers and magazines after class, which helps to improve my English. Besides, TV, English songs, films and radio programmes are of great help.

这篇习作主要论述学生交流英语学习的体会。要求对学习方法、学习收得,学习困难三个方面进行阐述。A段作者仅仅就自己如何学习英语的方法作了简单介绍,忽视了这些方法的益处的论述,给人以论述不全面的感觉。B段中作者运用了典范英语中那些细腻而生动的描写手法,使用了句式the more we read, the better our English will be.的结构,深化了内涵,而which helps to improve my English.简单却能很好地表达了其结果,最后的are of great help.更是诠释了其它途径的作用。这样一步步在原有语言的基础上加以拓展,让阐述的内容深入到字里行间,让人读后有充实之感,很有典范英语中语言的特色与功效。

三、个人情感的突出

学生习作时,忽视个人情感的抒发是常有的事,写作时常常不能将自己的情感加以流露。而一篇好的习作必然会包含一些情感性的话语,从而激起读者心灵上的共鸣,就好比典范英语中那些看似简单却富含深意的表达一样。试比较下面的两段描写,领悟其中情感性词语的妙用。

A). The government has done its best to improve the housing conditions, which makes our city more beautiful. The law and order situation has been improved greatly and the public order is better now.

B). The government has taken many measures to better the housing conditions and beautify the city, making it a more pleasant place to live in. Thanks to the efforts of the police, the law and order situation has been improved greatly. To our delight, the public order is far better than before.

这是论述创建文明城市后的一些变化的文章。A段只是介绍了政府采取的一系列措施和社会治安状况,未能在段落中很好体现个人的情感。而B段则在叙述中添加了一些抒发个人情感的词汇与短语,读后感觉截然不同。例如:改进住房条件小作者使用了better the housing conditions;美化城市:beautify the city;舒适的地方:pleasant place;除此之外还运用了Thanks toTo our delight等较能体现个人情感的短语,恰到好处的将个人的内心感受表达得淋漓尽致,阅读之后温馨感油然而生,具有典范英语中描写细腻情感的特色与效果的味道。

    通过以上几个不同段落的对比可以明白,英语书面表达不仅仅局限于对所给的汉语提示的表达,更多的时候要根据不同体裁的内容增添适当的细节内容,让所写的文章,主题突出、阐述得当、内容翔实、情感丰富而真挚。这样的书面表达才会更多地获得阅卷教师的青睐。成功做到这一点,坚持典范英语的阅读是必不可少,更是不可或缺。

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